Sex Lives: A Guy Who Learned About Sex From Watching Porn With His Friends


For Sex Lives, GQ speaks with someone about their entire sex life up to this point and how their sexuality has evolved. This week: John, straight, New Jersey.

One of the first times I watched porn, I was over at a buddy’s house, this was probably in fifth grade. His older brother was two years older than us, and he showed a big group of us porn. I remember thinking, “Oh, this is kind of funny.” That was my first reaction to porn. I started watching it myself a few years later, but that was definitely an interesting experience for sure, standing around a computer with a number of other guys. I thought it was funny, but I was definitely, definitely intrigued as well. Soon after that I was at my middle school orientation; it was the first day of middle school and the kids from all the feeder elementary schools were in an assembly and I remember seeing this girl and for the first time I wanted to do something more than just hold her hand or kiss her.

I lost my virginity in college. I was 21 and it was a drunken one night stand. I was living with two other guys and it was one of the first weeks of school. We were living in a co-ed dorm and lived right next to these girls, and I remember one of my friends earlier in the night was talking about how he really wanted to sleep with the girl who lived next door to me. I thought she was cute, but I didn’t think anything of it. I headed back to my room to get something and their door was open and they were drinking and then we started talking and the next thing you know I’m losing my virginity. My friends were very proud of me. They all knew my situation.

Before I lost my virginity, I paid to get a happy ending massage. It was freshman year of college, spring break, and I was waiting for my fantasy baseball draft and I was really bored and horny and so I looked up “happy ending massages” or something like that and the websites made it very clear you weren’t going to have sex with the women. So I found a place at the mall about 10 minutes from my parents house and I went to this hotel next to the mall and I went up to the second floor and a woman who was in her 30s or 40s was there; again, I was 18 at this point. She told me to leave my “donation” on the table so I paid my $100 or $120, which would pay for an hour of her time. She and I both got naked and I got on the bed face down and then she just kind of started rubbing her body over me. After a couple minutes she had me turn over and she started rubbing herself on me again and I shot a load in like two seconds. Again, keep in mind I’m a virgin. She looked at me very seriously and said, “Oh, baby, you busted already?” and I said, “Is that a problem?” and she was like, “You’re only allowed to bust one time.” Keep in mind I’d paid for an hour of time and this was about seven minutes in. By the time I was getting up to leave, she was already on the phone with her next client. 



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